Improving your self esteem is much easier than you think or currently believe and the first step in becoming a person with higher self esteem is to realize the that high self esteem is more than just self confidence.
Self esteem means quite literally the value we put on ourselves. It comes from the latin translation aestimare, literally meaning: ‘to put a value on’. Neuro-linguistic programming gives us the tools to model and identify patterns of behaviour and how to replicate those patterns in ourselves.
Once we know the ingredients we can then make a similar cake ourselves.
What are the key ingredients people with high self esteem share?
People with high self esteem have a unshakable core self liking, have the ability to manage their state well, have a clear sense of purpose and a strong, unshakable self identity.
In this article i’m going to share two very simple and quick techniques i use with my clients to help you improve the first trait, your core self liking.
Get a pen and piece of paper and start to list anything you can think of that you like about yourself. It might be anything from a personality trait such as being compassionate towards other people, to that funny shaped toe nail. It might be that you was great at school or it might be your name.
Keep listing down things you like about yourself all week, no matter how big or how small.
What will happen is at the end of the week you will find things you like about yourself that you would normally miss.
Other steps to start liking yourself better:
Start enjoying yourself more. At the end of the day take five minutes to ask and answer the question:
”what did i like about myself today?”.
Include everything, no matter how small or how stupid it may seem.
Maybe you took longer this morning over getting dressed deciding what to wear so you looked great.
Maybe you simply spoke to someone nobody else is friendly towards.
It could be liking yourself for stopping yourself doing something.
It could be the way you kept calm or alert during that meeting.
Once you have identified something no matter how trivial, say:
”I like myself’.
Notice how you respond when you say this.
Are you comfortable saying this?
What is your body telling you about how comfortable you are?
If you find yourself not feeling comfortable, ask:
”What stops me, What stops me from liking myself?”.
Another equally good question to ask yourself in this situation is:
”What would happen if i did like myself?”.
Once you put these tools to work you’ll start liking yourself more much sooner than you think!
by Darren Scrivens
Darren Scrivens also known under the pseudonym ”Enigma” is one of the united kingdom’s most sought after business, life, success and dating coaches. Darren not only uses a highly individualized process, but is also a walking example of the great coaching skills he utilizes with private clients having used them personally to overcome obesity, severe shyness and anxiety issues as well as overcoming and living with a 10 year illness and starting a highly successful career. Darren is also a coach to several coaches. Internationally renowned with clients based around the world, Darren has also featured on the internet insider dating program bonus as the special guest speaker. Darren looks forward to working with you to help you build a successful and powerful life in all areas.
