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How to Build Self Confidence at Work
Sep 10th, 2007 by admin

Building Self-Confidence at Work – 5 Things You Can Do
Self-confidence is definitely a trait worth cultivating at work. Self-confidence helps you to project an aura of confidence that makes others trust in your abilities to complete a job successfully.

However, many people are not fully secure about their abilities around their job. Here?s a secret ? the self-confident people often aren?t either! The difference is that they pretend that they can do something, even if they are not sure how when they start out, knowing that 9 times out of 10 they will figure things out along the way.

If you?re looking for increased self-confidence in performing at work, dealing with coworkers, and handling tough situations, you’re not alone. So what can you do to feel more self-assured about your job?

1. It?s OK to Make Mistakes

Firstly, remember that you are not your job. So if you make a mistake at work, this does not mean that you are stupid, worthless, or that you’re in the wrong job. It’s easy to take mistakes personally, seeing them as a reflection of your true person rather than for what it is: – just a mistake.

Even the super self-confident people and ?stars? make mistakes from time to time. They know that this is inevitable and just deal with it and move on. An often unrecognized benefit of mistakes is that they give us great learning opportunities.

If you make a mistake, the best way to deal with it is to own up to it right away and present a solution. This shows that you are trustworthy, and by presenting ways to fix the problem, you demonstrate your creativity and your boss can have confidence in your ability to deal with the issue.

Acting honestly and straightforwardly is always the best policy. You will be pleasantly surprised how willing most people are to help. Engaging with other people and accepting their help will build better working relationships and you’ll feel better about yourself. It?s also going to create the best outcome for the company, which again will help you feel better.

2. Getting On With Co-workers

Another common self-confidence issue is feeling insecure when it comes to co-workers. Many people feel that they do not fit in, are unsure how to handle conflict, or have an overbearing co-worker or boss that they don’t know how to communicate with. Any of these feelings can wear at your self-esteem.

If your self-confidence is low, you may feel you have nothing to offer your work colleagues, socially or on projects. This might mean that in order to avoid conflict, you allow others to step on you.

If socialization is difficult for you, it does require you to step out of your comfort zone a bit. This does not mean you need to jump straight into being a social star, rather just make a point of opening conversations with one or two co-workers at social gatherings. Chances are you’ll find you have something in common to talk about. Asking questions about the other person is always a great way to go. Ask ?open? questions that invite the other person to talk. These questions often begin with a phrase like ?What do you think about . . .? or ?How did you . . .? instead of questions that invite simple yes or no answers.

3. Conflict Resolution

It is not pleasant having to deal with conflict and with difficult people, but communication skills certainly make the task easier. There are proven communication techniques you can learn to help with this. If you are in a supervisory or managerial position, it is worthwhile attending a course specifically on conflict resolution and dealing with difficult people.

In general, remember that an overbearing person probably has a lot of insecurities as well, and hides behind their overbearing exterior. In the midst of conflict, do your best to avoid being pulled into argumentative situations. Don’t reward the other person’s behavior by getting upset or immediately backing down. If necessary, say you’ll continue the conversation when everyone has had a chance to cool down. Dealing with negative co-workers is never fun. Try and remember that your self worth is not dependent on your co-worker’s approval, even if that person is your boss.

4. Upgrade Your Skills

Learning is a lifelong process and my advice is if in doubt, the solution is probably to learn more. If you’re feeling unsure about your skills, it?s probably time to go back to class.

Many companies offer continuing education options and will gladly pay for schooling, or offer professional development in house, because they know it makes you more valuable and productive for them.
Whatever your employer offers, in the way of education and training, take advantage of it. If your company does not offer training, educate yourself by reading good books on the subject. Ask your colleagues for suggestions, or if you’re a member of any type of professional group, seek advice there as well. Many of your peers will have good suggestions on what’s worth looking into.

5. Take on New Challenges

Finally, regularly give yourself new challenges. One great way to build your self confidence at work is to take on a special project. Especially if you are able to choose something you feel passionate about or something in your specialty area, you will be able to demonstrate to yourself and your colleagues that you are able to produce results.
To take on a new challenge demonstrates initiative and willingness to be part of special projects. What better confidence booster could you ask for, than to know that you put yourself out there and didn’t sit on the sideline.
by Chris Galloway
The author is a senior sales executive who has consistently turned out the results he promised during his thirty year career, with time to spend with his family and ride his motorbike. Investigate your own career options at http://www.careerportalonline.com
Jobs and Careers Related Articles

The Relationship Between Self Esteem and Video Games
Sep 9th, 2007 by admin

Are Video Games Killing Your Self-esteem?
Video games are the number one form of entertainment, bigger than movie theatres. For most people there is more money being spent on games than education. Interestingly the biggest growth segments is 25-35 year olds. How do these games affect our self-confidence?
I have a contact at the highest levels of the video gaming world and I asked this person what kind of games are the most popular. Can you guess what they said? Anything violent, I doubt anyone is surprised by that piece of information.
This exposure to violence affects our fight or flight response and can seriously change how we perceive people around us. Are they going to attack me, if only I could just hit my boss with a ray gun? You may laugh but there are plenty of new reports of people re-enacting video game violence in real life.

Read the rest of this entry »

Self Esteem and Self Talk
Sep 7th, 2007 by admin

Build A Relationship With Your Inner Critic

What is your inner critic really trying to teach you? Yes, most of the time,
your inner critic offers up negative, fear-based comments. But, if you build a
relationship with your inner critic ? find out what it?s really trying to tell
you, you can learn a lot from it.
The first thing to do is to identify when you’re inner critic is talking to
you. And you know this, because your inner critic usually tells you things that
reinforce your fears.

Read the rest of this entry »

Self Esteem and Self Confidence
Sep 4th, 2007 by admin

Self esteem is not always obvious. If a person is successful in their career, that does not necessarily mean they have self confidence. Appearance can be deceiving. In fact 2 out of 3 people have a low self esteem. It alwaysdoesn’t show on the outside. This article explores self confidence and self esteem and gives case studies as to how self confidence has been improved.
Building Self Confidence and Self Esteem


As a hypnotherapist I specialise in helping people to develop confidence and
self esteem.


Perhaps surprisingly, the people who ask for my help are not shrinking
violets and their reasons for wanting to develop enhanced self confidence are
not wholly selfish. Consider a few examples. The names have been changed.


John works for a large corporate. Diligent, startlingly intelligent and very
ambitious, he found that his ideas were consistently overlooked. This wasn?t
enough of a catalyst to bring him to my door, however. He eventually grew
frustrated, and then angry, that dominant individuals in his company were able
to put their own ideas forward with ease. Worst of all, some of these ideas, he
felt, were positively damaging, but he just couldn?t make his opposition count.
All his intelligence counted for little in his testosterone-fuelled working
environment. It had reached the point where he felt that he should resign and
start again with a fresh company; he simply didn?t feel that he was adding any
real value. A man of great integrity, John would rather leave than tacitly
support such a wrong-headed and unintelligent approach to business.


John stayed. We worked together to identify his confidence profile, which was
very unusual — represented by less than 1% of the population. Through work on
his stage presence and physical presence, we were able to significantly improve
John?s effectiveness in being taken seriously, to the extent where he has
recently broken through into senior management.


Jenny came to me because she was lonely. A brief marriage hadn?t worked out,
and she was finding serial dating to be a frustrating activity. Jenny had come
to realise that she wasn?t moving out of her ?comfort zone?, either socially or
at work. She feared becoming enclosed, locked into a safe routine which wouldn?t
threaten her, but wouldn?t take her life forward either.


Jenny?s confidence profile was almost the inverse of John?s. Where he had
masses of peer independence, Jenny had almost none, which meant that she was
hugely dependent on the good opinion of others. She needed lots of reassurance,
and had very little faith in her own ability or judgement.


The approach with Jenny was to strengthen her peer independence — her
ability to trust in her own judgement, independent of the views of others ?- and
to build up her self esteem. She has now met somebody, changed her job and moved
house — all in the space of a year!


What these case studies illustrate is the complex nature of self confidence.
It isn?t like height or weight; you can?t read off a single value which
describes a person. Confidence is complex and to develop, we need to understand
our confidence profile. I have subsequently made my confidence profile
questionnaire available through the Confidence Club website href="http://www.confidenceclub.net/"
target=_top>http://www.confidenceclub.net


This has enabled me to build up an even larger database of confidence
profiles, and allows people from all over the world to identify their particular
areas for improvement.


by Jim Sullivan

Jim Sullivan is a hypnotherapist specialising in confidence and self esteem
development. He works with individual clients, with companies looking to
de-stress their staff and through his Confidence Club website. href="http://www.confidenceclub.net/"
target=_top>http://www.confidenceclub.net

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